Hippie Baby

Time created by not having to work, and an unexpected burst of energy

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Some cheap white sleepsuits and vests from the second hand baby shop around the corner

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Recently reading Lauren Groff’s Arcadia, the story of a boy growing up in a commune in 1970s New York State, and  Mark Vonnegut’s Eden Express, his memoir of a psychotic breakdown at a commune

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Inspiration from Medicated Follower of Fashion

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Some Dylon Machine Dye and rubber bands

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Hippie baby clothes! Andy is horrified at the thought of having a hippie baby and has told me I’m not allowed to take the baby out of the house wearing them, haha.

Bank Holiday

I hope you all had a nice bank holiday weekend, whether you were working or not. Mine consisted of:

*Hanging out in a warehouse watching a theatre show/gig about an Italian Publisher – Neon Neon’s Praxis Makes Perfect. Loved it. We had to wear red and bring a book to swap – I took Dharma Bums and ended up with a book of jokes about Mouldy Mummies.

*Visiting Hangfire Smokehouse, a new BBQ place at a pub not far from us. Not a natural destination for a vegetarian maybe, but their lentil burger was amazing, as were the chips and slaw. And there was even the option of halloumi. Yum. We may be back…

*More house sorting, which meant a trip to the inevitable big blue and yellow box, followed by ice cream on Penarth Pier. And then my last shift at work!

*A picnic on The Kymin, overlooking Monmouth. In the 18th century, some of the rich of Monmouth formed the Monmouth Picnic Club and built a roundhouse on top of the hill, to protect their picnics from the wind. Genius idea. Luckily we didn’t need to seek cover, as the weather was gorgeous. I love getting to use my picnic set far too much.

37 Week Ramblings

So, 37 weeks. Babi is fully baked! I’ve now finished work and as I logged off last night I felt everything relax. Work’s been tough recently and I’m so looking forward to spending my energy thinking and preparing (as much as is possible anyway) for what’s to come in the next few weeks. I took advantage of the sun last week and washed some clothes, and was surprised how happy it made me to be hanging them up on the washing line. I think it was when I realised how much happiness I could find in little things like that, and how much more I’d look forward to a sunny day in the park compared to a crazy night of drinking and dancing, that I felt like I was ‘ready’ to have a child – as ready as you can be without really knowing what you’re letting yourself in for anyway.

I noticed my first stretch mark a couple of days ago (well, apart from the silver streaks already criss crossing my thighs and hips from growing up and out when I was younger). There was a brief moment of irritation (not least at the time I’ve spent slapping Bio Oil on myself) until I remembered that it would have been naive of me to go into this process thinking it wouldn’t change me, outside and in. I can’t really conceive of it just yet, but have this feeling that this whole thing is going to break me open in some way (and not just in the way implied by a colleague’s suggestion of ‘Torn’ by Natalie Imbruglia for my labour playlist…*)

A friend has asked me to be a bridesmaid in a couple of months and I’m really excited. Luckily she’s let us choose our own dresses. It’s funny how different my considerations are now than they would otherwise have been. Before I’d have been looking for a dress that hid my tummy. Now I accept I’m going my tummy’s not going to be that easy to hide, so which dress is best for getting my boobs out if I’m breastfeeding, which I hope to be. Although I am hoping there’ll be a little less tummy than the photo above! Having said that, everyone from the midwife to the checkout guy at Lidl has told me how small I seem to be carrying. I swear the baby is hiding in my chin(s). Or my arse. That’s the only explanation for how big they’ve gotten.

*For those wondering, other suggestions included Ring of Fire, Break On Through (to the Other Side), Push It, and Men at Work’s (I come from a land) Down Under. Wondering why I’m glad to have finished work?

Beatnik Blue

One of the things I was most looking forward to about buying a house was painting the walls random colours that would probably be far too bright and offensive for most people. It took a while but we eventually plumped for a colour called Beatnik Blue by Crown. I like that I can blend in with the walls with lots of my clothes.

It’s been fun decorating, although I’m not really one that cares all that much about interior design and the like. I know exactly what I like when perusing Pinterest, but as long as my place is vaguely teal and vaguely tidy then I’m happy. I actively resent having to think about curtains!

Anyway, I thought I’d take a few photos while it’s still vaguely tidy, as I’m sure it won’t stay this way for long!

My shiny things guarded by charity shop pug.
Photos from TokyoShelf above the bed – wedding date print from my lovely husband for my birthday, a Cathryn Weatherhead print and a photo by Eleanor Jane of Times Square in the snow, which reminds me of our honeymoon. 

Dressing table – Ikea Rast painted white and the drawer pulls replaced with ones from The Secret Garden. We bought the chair from a cute little vintage clothes shop called Giddy Aunt in Narberth.

Now onto the dining room!

32 Week Ramblings

Random baby thoughts from my brain:

*Apparently MiniReegz now weighs as much as a coconut. A wiggly kicky coconut.

*MiniReegz is due May 27th. The new series of Arrested Development is due May 26th. I can’t decide if this is good or bad timing.

*I have four weeks left in work. I can’t wait! I’m so excited at the prospect of having weekends off.

*I woke up excited the other day because I knew I’d dreamed the perfect baby name. Turned out, when I remembered it, that it was ‘Fold’. I think my subconscious needs to work a bit harder.

*We finally commenced Operation Baby Shop at the weekend. There’s still more to get but not much I don’t think. I can understand why people end up buying lots though. I wish more adult clothes came in dinosaur, robot and whale prints.

*MiniReegz gets the hiccups an awful lot – what’s s/he drinking in there!

*I’ve had most of my scheduled appointments with the cardiologist/anaesthetist/obstetrician etc  All they’ve recommended is that I have as pain-free, stress-free and as short a birth as possible. Can’t really argue with that I guess!

*Buying a car was easier than buying a pushchair.

*I’ve been using my self hypnosis birth preparation CD for weeks now. I fall asleep every time. They could be implanting all sorts of messages in my brain without me knowing. In fact, I’m going to blame them for this Creme Egg craving I seem to have developed (as if I don’t get that every year around this time…).

Excuse the smug face, double chin and exciting picture frames!

Magical Mystery Tour

Step right this way….

For my birthday last week Andy organised a weekend away, location unrevealed until we got there. He knows me so well, it was exactly what I needed. A couple of nights in a quiet B&B in Laugharne.

When we got there we saw a sign for Dylan Thomas’s Birthday Walk – a walk based on a poem he wrote about a walk he took on his thirtieth birthday. Seemed appropriate! It was cloudy but the views across the estuary were stunning.

“It was my thirtieth year to heaven”

Unfortunately, we were there the day after my actual birthday, or I could have got free pizza! Worth remembering for next year.

The next day, after some amazing Glamorgan Sausages at the B&B, we spent the morning hiding from the rain ducking in and out of craft and antique shops in Narberth, spending too much money on house things.

“but the weather turned around”

…and we got to have a pootle around Tenby.

Tenby, in Welsh, is Dinbych-y-pysgod, which means Little Fortress of the Fish, which I love. It reminds me so much of childhood holidays.

In the evening, Andy had booked us a table at The Cors, which was a really special place. It’s a converted Victorian building tucked away behind some beautiful gardens. At least, we were told they were beautiful. By the time we got there we had to use a torch to find our way which added to the magic. The owner was really friendly and they were so accommodating to my pregnant veggie awkwardness.

The next morning we took advantage of the perfect spring weather that greeted us, and took another walk around Laugharne. It felt so peaceful and perfect. A description of the walk online mentioned how the path took you away from the ‘hustle and bustle’ of Laugharne, which felt a bit of a silly thing to say about such a small peaceful town (although it was a fair bit rowdier on the Saturday night, I think there was some kind of sport on…!). But it made sense once you were out in the woods and felt everything had been left behind.

On our way home we stopped in the National Botanic Garden of Wales, which was also pretty peaceful. I imagine it’s more worth a visit in the summer, but it was still a lovely way to spend the afternoon.

It was so nice to get outside for so much of the weekend. I’ve been feeling a bit cooped up and it was lovely to feel that spring is on it’s way. I can’t wait.

Thank you so much to my wonderful mister for organising it, it was exactly what I needed.

28 Weeks Ramblings

I was reminded recently how lucky we’ve been in this journey so far, and how not to take any of it for granted. Life can be truly shitty and unfair sometimes, and we don’t always know what’s going on for people behind their smiles. I hope this household gets the healing and good fortune they need and deserve.

I also hope they don’t mind me continuing to ramble on here. It’s funny, I’ve yet to make any mention of my pregnancy on Facebook or Twitter – to begin with I wanted to make sure we could tell people in person, or at least personally. Now it’s just become a habit. It has been tempting at times to moan about the bloody heartburn, or weird leg cramps that have me tossing and turning each night, but I know really I’m lucky to be in a position to have those – and lucky that’s pretty much all I’ve been suffering with so far (searches desperately for wood to knock). I’ll still use this space for wittering on though, and hopefully it’s an easily avoidable place for people who don’t want to read it.

It’s hard to believe I’ve reached the third trimester already. Apparently this week, according to my app, baby weights the same as a Chinese Cabbage. This is in no way helpful as  have no idea what a Chinese Cabbage looks like. Last week they were a cauliflower. I’m going to be very disappointed when birth doesn’t result in me being able to open a greengrocer’s.

It’s been a week of appointments. I finally got to see the cardiologist. He put the kibosh on any thoughts I had still lingering of having a home birth, but I guess I had got used to that idea already. I think when I first got pregnant I had this very fixed idea of the very natural, crunchy, Ina May-approved, home birth I would have, probably with dolphins in the birthing pool, and friendly cows mooing alongside me in sympathy. Luckily, I’ve got a bit more open minded about just taking whatever comes, which is good as the cardiologist emphasised that the most important thing would be keeping my adrenaline levels down as much as possible – so lots of pain relief and probably pushing for a C-section earlier if things go on too long. Anyway, at least I’ve realised now the very obvious fact that there’s only so much planning we can do for these things, so I’m just going to see what happens.

That all feels like a long way off and not so much time at all.

‘Baby needs Nutella’ is a legitimate excuse right?